Juggling Just Deserts

Countess Vampira, darling, why are you weeping so?

It’s that…that…ghoulish husband of mine!

The Count?! Oh dear. Have a Bloody Mary and tell me what he’s done to get you in such a flitter this time. Flown through the mirrored glass doors because he couldn’t see his reflection again?

No, he…he’s…he says he’s not pleased with our relationship any longer. It’s missing a spark. I’m just not his blood type anymore! And…and…I caught him glancing at the girl’s neck next door.

Now, now, my little Contessa. Dry those pretty eyes. There’s none lovelier than you. That’s why he chose you to be his eternal bride in the first place.

Oh sure. Eternity sounded like a grand idea back then. Now he wants someone who is more interesting, he says. Someone who can juggle more tasks in the daylight hours…

Someone who can…???!!! What???!!!!

Oh, Mummy!!! Whatever am I going to do?

Now, now…shhh, darling. You dry out your eternally lovely eyes before you cause a tiny crack in that thousands-year-old alabaster skin of yours. This is just another of those silly 700-year itches. Doesn’t mummy always know how to handle these things?

<Later that evening…>

You shared our conversation with…your mother??!!!

You know I share everything with her, darling – including my eternal home.

Our eternal home. You don’t have to remind me that I stuck myself in eternal hades with that bargain…

You’re only upset because, once again, she managed to get exactly what you requested – the very thing you specified you desired the most. Someone who could juggle more tasks in the daylight hours than can I, while you take your coffin breaks.

No doubt my vampiress-in-law is never at a loss to please me. The old bat is such a pain in the neck! She went directly for my jugular on this one!

 DSC_0042

A sexy vampiress AND her mother to take care of her wanton needs. A win-win situation, they said. Everlasting hades, I tell you!

And this one especially bites!

____________________________________________________________________________________________

This story is brought to you by this week’s one-word prompt at Trifecta:

1a : to practice deceit or trickery on : beguile
b : to manipulate or rearrange especially in order to achieve a desired end
2a : to toss in the manner of a juggler
b : to hold or balance precariously
3: to handle or deal with usually several things (as obligations) at one time so as to satisfy often competing requirements <juggle the responsibilities of family life and full-time job — Jane S. Gould>

Please remember:

  • Your response must be between 33 and 333 words.
  • You must use the 3rd definition of the given word in your post.
  • The word itself needs to be included in your response.
  • You may not use a variation of the word; it needs to be exactly as stated above.
  • Only one entry per writer.
  • Trifecta is open to everyone. Please join us.

The picture is brought to you by my walk through the park last week, in which this unsuspecting gentleman was kind enough to give permission for me to take his photo, but didn’t know I intended to serve him up to Count Dracula – nor did I, at the time. We’ll call this a fortuitous prompt (for me; not his juggling jugular, obviously!).

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47 thoughts on “Juggling Just Deserts

  1. If there are no laws against too many puns in a single place than there should be one and you should be the first prosecution! Hang your head in shame!

  2. Hilarious.. flown into the mirrored doors again.. not my blood type… I could go on.. terrific! Brightened my afternoon in spite of the fact that they are creatures of the night!

  3. This is one of the best entries that I have come across so far on Trifecta in the last 3 months that I have been here:-)I just loved every bit of this hilarious piece-even read it out to my daughter & had another laughathon!Would love to read an extension(series may be) of this one:-)

    • You just made my day, Atreyee! You should see the grin on my face right now. Here, look – 🙂 (no, it’s bigger than that! hehe) Why don’t you take the next part? You & your daughter could extend the fun with a new segment.

      • Ha!ha!So glad to have added some sunshine to your day:-)Ah,I would never know how & my daughter is too busy with her school leaving exams at the moment:-)

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