Howl-O (No)-Ween (us from the) Elections

How appropriate that our national elections are scheduled to occur just

after  Howl-O-ween.

Here’s a recap of events leading up to our hallowed election eve…

The Big Show kicked off with both Political UNconventions, otherwise dubbed to many as The Little Shops of Horror.

  • It’s rumored that Obama led the Democrats in Michael Jackson’s dance rendition of Thriller.

 

  • It’s furthermore rumored that for the GOP, Mitt Romney & Paul Ryan re-enacted the parts of Brad Majors and Janet Weiss arriving at the Annual Transylvanian Convention in The Rocky Horror Picture Show.

 

This year’s political fright-night agenda includes the following Tricks (not Treats), boys and girls:

  • The Health-scare Deformation

  • Alien Abduction (re: illegal immigrants)

  • Nightmarish Budgetary Horrors, to include:

    • Inoculations for The Tax Plagues, up from the grave of the past century

    • Federal Deficit Snipe Hunts

  • Gray Matter Rights (for all voting constituents who have not yet been lobotomized)

  • Upcoming/Continuing Wars of Marvel Comics Proportions

  • Past Presidents (& Presidential candidates who should have been severed) now Resurrected from both dilapidated parties

  • Media Witch Hunts, complete with leaked, recorded stake-outs

  • Unemployed Mobs conducting General Mass Chaos (or maybe just lying on their couches with their government-subsidized high definition cable, while the employed mobs work harder to support the mounting demands in lifestyle of those who have the ability to work but refuse to go to school or get a job)

Apparently, Americans have been given two choices:

To either conservatively Gird our Loins

or

To liberally Show our …

So I hope you’ll (enthusiastically?) join me at the polls!

OK, how about if you just be there…

(so you have to accept a portion of the blame too).

Celebrate Good Times – or other times, if nothing good can be found

If you’ve come this far, you may as well keep going…

Bonus Read: In case you need a write-in for your ballot, well, I’ve really got nothing for you.

But if you need more voting incentive, you can follow this link to check out my stellar, albeit late, recommendation for a Vice Presidential candidate.

And, yes, less you doubted it for the briefest flash of a second…

I am An American Girl.

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